In the years that have passed since coming into adulthood, I have been met with a lot of disappointment. Whether it’s been with my career path, my schoolwork or my love life, disappointment knows how to find me. I’m not alone either. Everyone has had a disappointment or two in their life and are almost guaranteed to have more. Letting go of expectations may be just the thing you need to do to combat future let downs.
Expectations breed disappointment. If you didn’t at least have an idea of what you would have liked a situation’s outcome to have been, you wouldn’t be let down when it turns out differently. I’m one to plan out the things that I do. I DO NOT like confusion because I can be quite indecisive in the moment. I like to have a clear plan and stick to it! And while planning out events and activities does help me, I know I’m not God and life is still going to happen around me. I can plan to go to the Farmer’s Market at noon, but I can’t control the traffic that has now put me an hour behind and pissed me off. I can put together a five paragraph essay to explain to my boyfriend why I’m upset, but I can’t dictate how he’s going to respond. Disappointment usually happens when reality doesn’t play out how you’ve imagined it so my advice to you is to stop living in your head and live in the now.
Living in a constant state of dissatisfaction can be exhausting for you and the people around you. Let’s say there’s an opening in your company for a higher level position. You work your ass off for that promotion. You imagine all the things you’re going to be able to do after that pay raise, all the money you could save (or spend). Then you don’t get it, now you’re upset. While it’s okay to get upset, you can’t stay upset. You have to understand that if you didn’t already expect this promotion you wouldn’t have been let down. Work hard because you enjoy what you’re working on, not just for the paycheck. Start looking around at all that you have and appreciating all that you are right now. Even if you don’t like the job you have, but it’s paying your bills, work it until you can find another job that you love AND pays your bills. Show gratitude for what you have and you’ll be rewarded in time.
Understanding that things are how they are can be one of the hardest parts of dissolving expectations. Nothing is going to turn out how you expect it to. It won’t always be for the worst, but it won’t be exactly what you wanted. Maybe you didn’t get that position because an even better opportunity is about to come along or you simply weren’t ready. Maybe your significant other is acting shady even though you’re giving your all because they aren’t meant for you. Like I said earlier, you can plan all you want, but life will continue to happen how it is supposed to. Our job is to keep living, keep learning and keep loving. We can do nothing but continue giving our best efforts and enjoying the moments while we are in them. Once you simply start living in the moment, you will begin letting go of expectations and start to lead a more fulfilled life.
(Disclaimer: I do not think I am a professional anything lol. I’m just sharing what I’ve experienced and what people close to me have experienced. You can take and apply what you can to your own life or choose not to. Thank you for reading!)